


Close To You

by randomfandomimagine



Series: Imagines (Reader Insert) [40]
Category: Divergent (Movies), Divergent - All Media Types, Divergent Series - Veronica Roth
Genre: Dauntless Faction, Divergent Reader, F/M, Jeanine Matthew's Daughter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-16
Updated: 2019-05-16
Packaged: 2020-03-06 07:16:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18846247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/randomfandomimagine/pseuds/randomfandomimagine
Summary: Requested by anon:Could you please write an imagine (Divergent &EricxReader) where Eric is worried about y/n because he can’t find her and he is in love with her. And when he finds her he kisses her and confesses his love ♡ with much fluffRequested by @rachelcarroll1819 (Tumblr):Can i please get a imagine where the reader is Jeanine Matthews daughter and is divergent but she hid it and decided to go to dauntless where she makes friends with four and she in a relationship with eric please and thank you





	Close To You

I was shaking from head to toe. The crowd around me didn’t help, and neither did the thousands of eyes focused on me. It felt like their attention meant something terrible. That they knew my secret.

You’re a divergent. The examiner’s words echoed in my head as I slowly made my way to the front of the big room. I had heard stories about divergence, about unique people whose attitude exam sorted them into more than one faction. Like me. However, all those people ended badly. Being divergent was dangerous.

“Y/N Matthews” She insisted, as her stern blue eyes watched my every move.

I hurried to arrive to the podium to reunite with my mother. I gulped as I stood next to her, under her attentive glance. I opened my mouth, wondering whether I should tell her or not. It would alleviate the weight on my shoulders, but…

She arched her eyebrows in expectation, but I closed my mouth and stood in front of the five choices before me instead. I closed my eyes tight for a moment, shaking my head and trying to focus. How could I tell Jeanine Matthews that I was divergent? Even if I was her daughter, even if she was my mother, she was so obsessed with the faction system and the rules that I wasn’t sure I could tell her.

“Choose wisely” Came her voice, soft yet grave.

I picked up the knife and held it above my palm, which hovered over the five recipients.

Watching her with the corner of my eye, I noticed my mother still staring. What would I choose? Erudite, Dauntless, Amity, Candor or Abnegation? I knew what she wanted me to choose, but I couldn’t.

It usually was a dissapointment for the family when the children chose a different faction, but in this case especially so. If Jeanine Matthews’ own daughter forgave Erudite, how would that leave her?

I moved my hand to stay over the Erudite recipient filled with water, they started shaking more than before as I rested the blade on my skin. I just… I couldn’t do it! I wasn’t smart, nor devoted to knowledge and order.

Moving my hand, I gulped as I put it over the recipient full of stones of Abnegation, to be kind and altruistic. But I wasn’t like that either, not entirely.

I eyed the recipient filled with glass from Candor, but I wasn’t that honest. I wasn’t completely selfless or extremely friendly either, so I couldn’t choose Amity.

I had spent hours on end thinking about this important decision, losing days of sleep. I had come to a conclusion based on the logical reasoning I had been taught my entire life. Taking in consideration my situation and my preferences, there was only one choice. One that would also set me free.

Unsure of how long it had passed since I stood there without making a decision, even though it felt like hours, I took a deep breath. I was determined as I put my hand over the burning ambers and grit my teeth as I slid the blade over my palm, creating a small trail of blood as it poured out into the recipient.

“Dauntless!” A voice announced as the world began spinning around me at the implications of my choice. There was no going back now.

The only noise that followed was the entire faction of Dauntless welcoming me with thunderous applause and cheers. I couldn’t hear anything else, but I didn’t know if it was because they were so loud or because the rest of the present were too stunned and disappointed.

My heart wouldn’t stop racing as I moved to sit with the people dressed all in black. I didn’t make eye contact with my mother, but I did feel her burning glare in my nape as I walked away from her.

*

I winced when I landed on the floor again. Every inch of my body hurt, but I refused to give up. All eyes were on me again, even if judging me differently from those that observed me in the choosing ceremony.

“Get up!!” Eric shouted, one of the Dauntless instructors, along with Four.

I glared at him even as I did what he said. I looked at my hands to analyze the damage, seeing that the skin in my palms tore away slightly. The floor of the Pit wasn’t exactly soft and welcoming.

“Excuse me if I’m not at my best after running and jumping around all day” I told him, earning a baffled expression.

“Show some respect” Deadpanned Four, even if with a hint of defiance. “We’re the ones that decide your fate”

“Do it again” Came Eric’s raspy voice, earning a glance from me.

I huffed, but obeyed again, climbing back up. I was fed up already, having jumped on and off a moving train. Having blindly jumped into a net that I didn’t know was there, several stories below. Having run and exhausted myself only as an initiation.

And now I was supposed to risk my neck jumping to the other side of that stupid Pit? I looked at my initiate mates at the other side of it, there where I was supposed to jump. I was left alone at my side of the gap.

“None of us are moving until you do something” Eric insisted. “So you either make it or officially give up”

I clenched my jaw at the thought of giving up, because we all knew what it implied. And I didn’t exactly feel like going factionless after all I was going through.

My mind told me to analyze the situation, to gather as much information as I could to obtain a logical understanding. But my Erudite trained brain wouldn’t help much in Dauntless, so I tried to forget about the gap that separated me from the rest and about the long fall that, although it wasn’t enough to kill me, it would possibly injury me and definitely hurt a lot.

Being stubborn enough, I took a few deep breaths and prepared myself. Taking a running start, I moved to the edge and jumped to the other side. I screamed as I soared through the air for what it felt like several minutes until I grabbed the edge.

I grunted, lifting my other hand and holding tight. I tried to push myself up, but my strengths were failing me. My fingers cramped at the effort.

“Nobody help her!” Eric’s potent voice echoed around the Pit.

Another grunt escaped my throat as I made a titanic effort to lift myself up, turning into a strained scream. But I made it over the edge, where I collapsed onto the ground. My heartbeat echoed in my ears and my chest quickly raised up and down with my accelerated breathing.

“Good” Eric said with a neutral voice, and suddenly everyone began leaving.

I had been the last one after all, but I was just proud to have made it.

The only one to stay behind was Four, who towered over me and offered me his hand. Mustering the strength to just take it, I allowed him to pull me up.

Once in my feet, I watched Four in expectation. He didn’t say anything, only nodded and walked away like everyone else. For him, that must have been some sort of ‘good job’, I supposed.

I just stood there alone, tiredly leaning on the wall when my knees began shaking and threatened to stop holding my weight.

*

I wasn’t used to my heart beating so fast, it barely stopped racing ever since the choosing ceremony. I supposed I would have to get used to it now that I was in Dauntless, especially being a divergent.

As I lied down on my bed, close to all my other fellow recruits, my heart had just started to acquire a normal pace. I was exhausted, because the tests had been more challenging than I thought, and definitely more physical. I recalled the events of the day as I lied awake, unable to fall asleep. 

I hadn’t really gotten along with any of my companions yet, but that would have to wait. It seemed, though, that I had made a good impression on my instructors. They had made an impression on me as well. Four, although stern and somewhat stubborn, was softer than Eric. 

Now, Eric caught my attention. His piercing eyes, his attitude, his bluntness. Sure, there were times when his roughness made me hate him during those first few tests, but all that was refreshing for a change. I enjoyed being challenged.

Somehow, though, it felt like I might be in the right place after all. I had spent all my life in Erudite, feeling like I didn’t belong, like I wasn’t intelligent nor interested enough in any of the guidelines that my faction expected from me.

Now I might be sore and mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted. But at least I felt free, I felt alive, I felt… great. Maybe it was the adrenaline still pumping through my veins, but I liked the feeling. For the first time in my life I felt like myself, and not what others expected me to be. Not even my mother.

But there, in Dauntless, I could prove myself. I could show everyone I was strong, that I was capable. Still, despite that rush I didn’t really forget about the danger of discovering myself as a divergent. I held myself back, thinking that if I was ‘too good’ I would arise suspicion.

Needing to get up from my bed and clear my head, I decided to take a walk. I hoped things settled, that it wasn’t like that all the time. That feeling of dread ruining my freedom tasted too bittersweet.

The tranquility in the environment, however, settled my nerves. The distant sound of water falling as I navigated through the Pit was somewhat comforting as it reminded me of the change from the scenery I was used to.

“What are you doing up?” An unexpected voice made me jump up.

I quickly turned around, alarmed by the intrusion, to meet face to face with Four. I lowly exhaled a breath of relief at the sight of him.

“Am I not allowed here?” I replied, challenging yet cautious.

Four snickered a little at my cheekiness, but didn’t answer the question.

“You did well today” He said instead, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Thank you” I tried to conceal how glad I was to hear those words.

“You seem a bit jumpy, though” With Four’s words, I realized my shoulders were tense. “Are you sure you made the right decision choosing Dauntless?”

“Yes” I half-questioned, relaxing my stance. “Besides, it’s not like I can change my mind now”

“You impressed Eric, so I guess that’s something” The corners of Four’s lips curled up slightly.

“Why, like he’s that big a deal?” I rolled my eyes, but before Four could reply, another voice interrupted him.

“Let’s just say I’m not easily impressed” Eric appeared from the shadows, apparently he had been listening to us.

When Four and Eric exchanged a glance, I wondered if they had planned it. Were they testing me further? Or was I just extremely paranoid because of my secret?

I held Eric’s stare when his eyes locked with mine. He blinked, but didn’t seem fazed by my audacity.

“Leave us one moment” Even though he didn’t break eye contact with me, I knew he was talking to Four. “I want to talk to Y/N”

I was honestly surprised that he even remembered my name, but I didn’t point it out.

Four nodded and patted Eric in the shoulder before taking the first step.

“Don’t be too hard on her” He warned him before walking off.

I briefly glanced at him as he did. I didn’t want them to go easy on me, I wanted to prove them my worth in front of them as much as in front of anyone. And I knew that Eric could be harsh and borderline cruel, but I wasn’t going to let him intimidate me.

“What is it?” I said as I looked at him again, trying to make myself look taller.

“You and I, we’re more alike than you think” Eric smirked, as it seemed it was the only gesture his mouth was able to showcase.

“Really?” I cocked an eyebrow at him and smirked too.

When he took a step closer, though, I took one back. The closeness flustered me, but I didn’t let that show. Even if I wondered why it was so important for me to impress him.

“Yeah, you’re tough too” He let out a sarcastic chuckle. “Tougher than you look”

“Is that a compliment or an insult?” A pang of pride reached my chest, but I only lifted my chin feigning arrogance.

“You’re fiery, I like you” I noted that his voice was huskier than usual, almost… playful? Flirtatious, perhaps?

“How are we similar other than that?”

“For one, we’re both transferred from Erudite”

“And?”

“And I’m interested in you, just like you’re interested in me”

“I’m not…” I might as well chosen Candor, because I was more transparent than I thought. Especially since I felt my cheeks burning up in embarrassment. “You’re not that interesting”

“Oh, yeah?” His hand found its way to my back, bringing me closer.

“Y-Yeah” I stuttered, but held my stance, even pushing my hands against his chest. “As I said, you’re not that big a deal”

“Then you won’t mind that much if I do this” Before I could ask what stupid thing he was going to do, he smashed his lips against mine.

I yelped, but not because I didn’t enjoy it, but because of the shock. We lingered in the kiss, which had a roughness that was somehow exciting. I didn’t realize how truly attracted I was to him until I clung on to him, not having enough of it.

When we broke away I grew very aware of his hands around me, one on the back of my neck and the other in the small of my back. My arms were over his shoulders, bringing him closer to me like he had done with me.

“Do you usually go around kissing new recruits like this?” I said to conceal the fact that I was breathing heavily.

“No” He squeezed my waist before letting go of me. “But you’re not like the usual recruits either, are you?”

“How so?” I was confused when he started walking away.

“Others wouldn’t have kissed back”

Hence, Eric left me there alone, standing in the middle of the Pit as my head spun thinking about that kiss.

*

As much as I tried not to stand out, I did. I soon came first in most of our tests, earning both Four and Eric’s attention. It was hard finding a balance between hiding my identity and trying to make it into Dauntless. Being factionless was just as scary as being discovered.

One day that my thoughts were especially anguishing, I went to a corner of the Pit to be alone and think. The quiet of the place still helped me, allowing me to breathe after I had been too anxious to.

I sat there cuddled over myself, trying to avoid any thoughts regarding divergence or factions. Instead, the random thought of my new companies in Dauntless popped up in my mind. I still didn’t really get along with the initiates, but I was kind of close with Four and with Eric.

I had been sitting there, away from everyone for hours. I wondered if someone missed me. If, for some reason they found out about my divergence and wanted me to punish me for it, would people actually notice my absence? I found the answer before I could properly consider the possibility.

“There you are” A familiar raspy voice got me out of my thoughts.

I looked over my shoulder and saw Eric walking closer to me. recognizing a new emotion in his features.

“What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same thing, I’ve been looking everywhere for you”

“I needed to be alone”

“Why?”

“None of your business”

I expected Eric to snicker as he did every time I came up with responses like that, but instead he grew quiet, slowly approaching me when I didn’t move.

“Cut it out, I know” His voice sounded serious, as was his stare while he towered over me. “Don’t hide it from me”

Always alert on the matter, I tensed up. Despite it all, I shrugged and fixed my eyes up ahead not to meet with his.

“What are you talking about?”

“Four told me”

“Tell you what?”

“That you’re a divergent” Time seemed to freeze for a moment.

I locked eyes with Eric, but his expression was inscrutable. Moving in a daze, I stood to my feet, which I wasn’t sure was a great idea since my legs were shaking.

Four somehow figured it out, even if I never gave any signs of deviance. It was true that he noticed I was jumpy and always alert, but that wasn’t strange being in constant competition and danger like we were.

It made me question how he knew. The idea that he might be divergent too -takes one to know one -crossed my mind, but I would have to talk to him. Not now, though, because Eric expected an answer.

“I…” The words suddenly caught in my throat when I tried to reply to Eric. “You don’t… I…”

“I’m glad he did” Eric said to cut my blabbering. “That way I can protect you”

I gawked at him, realizing he wasn’t going to give me in. And he… wanted to protect me?

“I don’t need your protection” Was what I said instead, without really meaning to. I was just defensive, too scared of the consequences of his discovery.

“I know” I froze when his hand rested against my cheek. “But I still want to”

I was puzzled by Eric’s behavior. He was always tough, stubborn, cold. Yet, as I observed him while he looked at me I found worry in his eyes as they frantically took in every detail of my face.

“You seemed pretty worried that you couldn’t find me” I mumbled to test him.

“I just didn’t know where you were” He said as he dropped his hand off my cheek and to his side.

“Why do you care so much?”

“I just wanna be close to you”

“How’s that?”

“I have no idea, it doesn’t make sense to me either”

There was a pause in which we looked into each other’s eyes, seizing each other up. Eric smirked in the end, and I finally relaxed.

“Fine, you wanna be close to me” I flirtatiously said, taking a step closer. “What makes you think I do too?”

“You’re still here, aren’t you?” His arms suddenly wrapped around me.

“Just because you know my secret” I teased him, inching closer to his lips but never making a move.

His smirk acquired a dangerous hint as he closed the distance, causing our mouths to graze but not touch. They were painfully close wihout makign contact.

“Then I guess I have to keep your secret” When he spoke, I could feel his breath against me.

“Maybe” I didn’t move, and neither did he, we lingered in that position.

The both of us broke apart before anything could happen, since neither was willing to give up. I turned around with a smirk plastered on my lips, but it only widened when I felt his hand against my wrist.

Eric tugged at my arm until I faced him again, and he hungrily kissed my lips before letting go of me. I cheekily smirked at him before we both left. Together.


End file.
